Dear 25-year-old me,
First of all, congratulations on being alive. There were definitely a few tumor-y years there where I thought you would never exist. So, if you really are 25-year-old me and reading this, SWEET. You made it to a quarter of a century. You can no longer use a 24 pack of candles on your birthday cake. Good for you.
I have a million questions, but I suppose they are pointless because by the time you read this they will already be answered. Oh, well. From that point of view this whole letter would be pointless, so here we go. You did marry Rex, right? Please say yes? Because if you are still with him, 25-years-old and not married, I am seriously mad at you. You have been together for what, eight years? If you're not married by then, that's ridiculous. If you broke up with him, you're an idiot. You and I are officially in a fight (can you fight a different aged version of yourself? I will look into this). If he broke up with you...well, that's just silly. He wouldn't do that. I mean, you wouldn't break up with him either... Whatever. I just hope you guys are married, and I hope he asked you before you were practically old, like, 23 or something. He he he... ;-)
On the note of marriage, do you have any kids? I hope not. Why on Earth would you want to have a kid, especially at the age of 25? I'm sure if you do have one then he/she is all cute and blahdy blahdy blah, but your twenty-year-old self can't really comprehend that kind of responsibility at this point. Kids are scary! You mess them up enough by teaching them - don't try bringing one of your own into the world yet. You throw birthday parties for your rat; I think you have some issues to work through. lol.
You did graduate from MSU in 2010, right? Because that's definitely the plan. Let's not deviate from that, okay? And you got the math minor? Have you used it yet? I really hope you use it in life. What are you doing for a job, anyway? Do you like it? If you don't like it, why don't you quit? Do something you love. I realize you need money and all that, but teaching is your passion. Please do that? Unless you're a stay at home mom or something (back to "please don't have kids yet!"). Please don't call me immature and naiive for telling you to do something you love. See it is "pure of heart." I know people who have ruined their lives by working a job they hate. Don't do that, okay? Promise?
How's your relationship with God going? Is it better than when you were 20? I hope so. It should get better every day. PLEASE tell me you've read through the entire Bible at least once. Don't get stuck in Ezikiel like I keep doing. Make it through! He loves you so much - are you being a living sacrifice for Him? Do people see Him in you? Are you giving all you have for His glory? That's all that really matters in life, you know.
Is the family doing okay? Please tell me they're all still around. Nana would be what, 77? That's not that old. Please don't tell me the cancer came back. How's Cara? She's graduating this year, isn't she? Where's she going to college? Did she go crazy in high school? (PS - your 20-year-old self calls it that she does). Are Mom and Dad more in love than they were when you were 20? Send them a note or something. They've gone through a lot to hold the family together. Is Dad more mature than when you were 20? (The 20-year-old self calls it that he's not). Also, did he ever sell that house? Did Cara get her dog?
Let's see...advice for me at 25...don't lose sight of the fact that you can't take life too seriously. The things I'm freaking out about right now: getting my passport in time for Australia, graduating on time, whether or not I'll be a good RA...how many of those matter to you at 25? Probably not many. How many of your problems will matter when you're 30? Just keep things in perspective, okay? God's got it all under control. He knows right where you will be when you read this, just like He knows right where I am in life right now as I write this. Pretty cool, huh? He can see both of us at the same time. HI, YOU! (I'm waving at you as you read this). Anyway, follow His plans, because your plans, when not in line with His, inevitably fail every time. If you've learned nothing else in twenty years of living, that's it. I'm sure you'll have to learn it again and again by the time you're twenty-five.
Do cars run on water yet?
Here's to your next five years,
20-year-old you
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Friday, July 10, 2009
Poems About Things
Poems are super fun. I may not be a fantastic poet, but who cares?? This is my blog so I can write what I want. No one's forcing you to subject yourself to this sub-Shakespearean level expertise.
For my creative writing class I had to write a poem in iambic pentameter. Here it is:
Her Royal Cuteness
I have a rat; her name is Cindy Lou
She’s gray and soft; how friendly she can be
If she was gone I don’t know what I’d do
I hope she always stays so close to me
Sometimes she’s in a kind of cranky state
But mostly she just kisses and is sweet
We found each other; maybe it was fate
That me and my best friend would just so meet
See? Wasn't that fun? Poetry is fun. Here's my ode to working at KAMSC:
Ode to KAMSC
I get payed to work with play-doh
That is pretty fun, you know?
We make Oobleck and we make slime
We just have fun all the time
Kids learn something when they're here
Math and Science- give a cheer!
School can be so very fun
That students cry when the week is done
So every summer, kids make me smile
I hope I work here for a while
I love KAMSC...I am actually here right now, working in the office, but my jobs are done so I'm just hanging out. Yep, that's right. I am getting paid to update my blog with silly poems. This is a good job.
Here's a poem I wrote about drowning:
Water
My lungs plunge into my gut
Searching for air
The water wells and swells around me
My sight sinks slowly
Salty tears press me from every side
And I don’t know which way is up
The loose ends of my hair swim sleepily
While my brain beneath them breathes
The last bit of oxygen in my body
The dreadful darkness dampens
And prepares to take me over
Something grabs my arm
Pulls me away from my tomb
Back into the light
Oooooh. Creepy, huh? I was going to end this post with that, but I figured that's sort of a melancholy way to leave you. I will end on this incredibly corny poem about farm life. I had to write it for a class and there were specific parameters, so don't judge too hard. It kinda makes me laugh, though.
I Just Moved Onto a Farm
I wake up to the sounds of ducks quacking
When I peek out the window I see sun
reflecting off of the morning dew
It cheerily wishes me “good morning” in harmony with the ducks
Chickens add their staccato
And horses whinny loud enough to wake the Queen of England
2,000 miles away
I roll out of bed and pull on some clothes
I have to go feed the animals
The goat’s fur is as rough as the straw they sleep in
And their horns threaten any unwelcome visitors
I am welcome, though, and they let out a happy bleat
Chickens gather round to peck at the goat’s food
Like old women at a clearance rack
I will feed them in a minute
The ducks splash happily in their kiddie pool
Which is the ocean in their farm duck world
The horses settle down a bit because they know I am coming.
Moving to this place made me nervous at first,
But the animals assure me I am welcome.
So there they are! Some fantastically awesome poems for your enjoyment! He he he...I love poems.
For my creative writing class I had to write a poem in iambic pentameter. Here it is:
Her Royal Cuteness
I have a rat; her name is Cindy Lou
She’s gray and soft; how friendly she can be
If she was gone I don’t know what I’d do
I hope she always stays so close to me
Sometimes she’s in a kind of cranky state
But mostly she just kisses and is sweet
We found each other; maybe it was fate
That me and my best friend would just so meet
See? Wasn't that fun? Poetry is fun. Here's my ode to working at KAMSC:
Ode to KAMSC
I get payed to work with play-doh
That is pretty fun, you know?
We make Oobleck and we make slime
We just have fun all the time
Kids learn something when they're here
Math and Science- give a cheer!
School can be so very fun
That students cry when the week is done
So every summer, kids make me smile
I hope I work here for a while
I love KAMSC...I am actually here right now, working in the office, but my jobs are done so I'm just hanging out. Yep, that's right. I am getting paid to update my blog with silly poems. This is a good job.
Here's a poem I wrote about drowning:
Water
My lungs plunge into my gut
Searching for air
The water wells and swells around me
My sight sinks slowly
Salty tears press me from every side
And I don’t know which way is up
The loose ends of my hair swim sleepily
While my brain beneath them breathes
The last bit of oxygen in my body
The dreadful darkness dampens
And prepares to take me over
Something grabs my arm
Pulls me away from my tomb
Back into the light
Oooooh. Creepy, huh? I was going to end this post with that, but I figured that's sort of a melancholy way to leave you. I will end on this incredibly corny poem about farm life. I had to write it for a class and there were specific parameters, so don't judge too hard. It kinda makes me laugh, though.
I Just Moved Onto a Farm
I wake up to the sounds of ducks quacking
When I peek out the window I see sun
reflecting off of the morning dew
It cheerily wishes me “good morning” in harmony with the ducks
Chickens add their staccato
And horses whinny loud enough to wake the Queen of England
2,000 miles away
I roll out of bed and pull on some clothes
I have to go feed the animals
The goat’s fur is as rough as the straw they sleep in
And their horns threaten any unwelcome visitors
I am welcome, though, and they let out a happy bleat
Chickens gather round to peck at the goat’s food
Like old women at a clearance rack
I will feed them in a minute
The ducks splash happily in their kiddie pool
Which is the ocean in their farm duck world
The horses settle down a bit because they know I am coming.
Moving to this place made me nervous at first,
But the animals assure me I am welcome.
So there they are! Some fantastically awesome poems for your enjoyment! He he he...I love poems.
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
His Plan
Maybe I am starting to see why God let me go through the Hellish ordeal earlier this summer. I think He wanted me to be at the Crookstons so that I could see an example of what life is supposed to actually be like.
God's plan for marriage and family can, in fact, work. This may seem like, "DUH" to many people, but I have never been truly convinced of this fact. It has been amazing for me to see the way things can be. It kills me that my family has been hurt in the process of me moving out, but even my dad sees that the Crookston's is a far better environment for me to be living in. He's just sad that "our family has never been able to be like that."
The Crookstons have been such a good example of God's love and generosity. They provide a sense of community and belonging that I have never experienced before. I feel as though I've been pessimistic about life, but living here has given me a sense of hope. Life can, in fact, turn out okay. God has been revealing His plan to me about how life is supposed to be. This is COOL. Getting to the point where I had to move in with them was a long and painuful road, but I can already see God using this in my life. I think He's going to work it all out.
God's plan for marriage and family can, in fact, work. This may seem like, "DUH" to many people, but I have never been truly convinced of this fact. It has been amazing for me to see the way things can be. It kills me that my family has been hurt in the process of me moving out, but even my dad sees that the Crookston's is a far better environment for me to be living in. He's just sad that "our family has never been able to be like that."
The Crookstons have been such a good example of God's love and generosity. They provide a sense of community and belonging that I have never experienced before. I feel as though I've been pessimistic about life, but living here has given me a sense of hope. Life can, in fact, turn out okay. God has been revealing His plan to me about how life is supposed to be. This is COOL. Getting to the point where I had to move in with them was a long and painuful road, but I can already see God using this in my life. I think He's going to work it all out.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Past and Future
I am one day - ONE DAY - away from the end of my junior year of college. WHOA - life comes at you fast. I decided to take a post to contemplate my memories (good and...erm....not so good) from this year and look ahead to what fun I will have this summer!
This year I...
1. Got MSU football tickets for the first time. GREAT idea. I will definitely be doing this again. The best game was vs. Wisconsin, who I watched beat us last year. THIS year, Rex and I sat twelve rows up from the field right behind the field goal posts where Swenson kicked a field goal with seven seconds left to let MSU win by 1. YAY!!! I still have the ticket stub in my wallet.
2. Had a sweet fall semester schedule: classes from 10:20 to 2:30 on Monday through Thursday. This was fab.
3. Had an AWFUL spring semester schedule. I took FOUR math classes!! WHO DOES THAT?? This was a bad idea. One more exam and I will have survived, though, so this is good.
4. Found out my brain tumors of last year "mysteriously" disappeared. Praise God!
5. Took a class with Rex. It was so fun! Well, the class wasn't. The class was totally boring. Rex and I passed notes during every class, though (a la government senior year), and that was fun. I am fully keeping my notebook from that class. It's hilarious. I think I 4.0-ed that class, too...we shall see...
6. Fretted about going overseas. I spent countless hours trying to find a way to get overseas this summer. I have a travel itch or something. Anyway, I tried study abroad, traveling with Rex, traveling with other friends, traveling by myself...nothing worked. Finally I said, "Okay, God. I give up. I'll just stay home this summer and see what you have for me there." Shortly after, I won a sweepstakes and got a free flight to Australia. Ha ha, God, very funny. Anyway, I'll see what happens with that. I'm not sure I want to go to Australia by myself, but we shall see!
7. Worked in a lab. I had a really fun job working for the DSME (department of science and math education). I had two bosses. The first one is named Margaret, and she is this kooky woman (oldish....fifties?) who listens to Usher and gets french manicures and is really sure she's totally hip. I love it. The other one is Dave, this awesome and slightly nerdy (graduated with a Physics major) guy who is currently trying to impregnate his wife so that they can have offspring to name Xellos (boy) or Myria (girl). Very cool. (?)
8. Worked in the cafeteria. Oh heavens I hated this job. I eventually quit (see the entry about a creeper...I think it was in March?).
9. Had a fantastic roommate. It was SO FUN to have Trissa as my roommate. She is super cool and makes a great friend, plus it was fun to hang out with her and Josh and Rex. It's a shame I'm not living in Williams next year...I will definitely miss her.
10. Became a rat mom/rat grandma. See my posts about Cindy Lou if you want to read about my rat, but she had babies this fall (they were precious!). Hopefully she'll be a mom again this summer...we shall see...
11. Joined the West Circle Bible Study and made GREAT friends with those girls. They're super fantastic, and I can't wait to come back next year!
I think that's good for now...it was a great year. Only what, 104 days until the fall semester begins? Something like that. In the mean time, though, I have SUMMER! Here are the things I am looking forward to for this summer:
1. Sonic - Rex and I are going to order one of everything off of the dollar menu. I can't wait. Sonic is so tasty...
2. Beach! I love MSU, but mid Michigan has no nearby beaches. I'm excited for South Haven trips with all of my friends.
3. New Hampshire - exactly 20 days until Rex and I fly out east to visit my grandma! It should be a great time.
4. Hanging out with Cara - I don't get to see her very much during the school year, and she's pretty cool.
5. Summer classes - Don't judge me. I'm taking creative writing, among others. Only one math class. It looks like a cakewalk compared to this semester. I'm excited.
6. Cindy's babies - hopefully we'll whip up another batch of them this summer, and they will be so cute!!! I'm so giving one to Carly...he he...
7. Carly - I don't really get to see her much during the year, so it will be nice to see her over the summer
8. Beth, Jula, and I's "girls weekend" - Our weekend at the cabin is going to be so fun. I'm totally stoked.
9. Camping - I currently have no solid plans to go camping, but I think it should happen. Camping is too fun to go an entire summer without.
10. Abroad trip? So I have this free trip to Australia...we shall see what comes of it...
11. Carrabbas - Rex and I's favorite restaurant. They don't have one in Lansing. I can't wait to taste that meat sauce again...mmmm.
12. Texas Corral Dooleys
13. Wendy's - Rex and I split 2 Spicy chicken go-wraps, one small chili and one medium fry. $6.34. Deliciousness.
14. Cooking! On the subject of food, I don't get to cook much (at all) on campus. I'm excited to try out new recipes and cook old favorites. Rex will inevitably come over and try all of my concoctions and then tell me I'm a great cook. I'm not sure whether or not he realizes that it's in his best interest to be honest, because if he says something is good then chances are he'll see it again someday. lol.
15. Tramp and Speed - This is so random, but I actually find myself really excited to play with Rex's dogs. They're so fun, and I never had dogs at my house. Now if only I could convince Mr. Webb to breed one of them and have some puppies...
16. Rex's mom's cooking - do I have too many entries on food? Oh, well. I love food. Mrs. Webb's is delicious. Especially her taco salad.
17. Taking Cindy and Houdini to the park - Rex and I already decided this. I want to see Cindy go down a slide. Maybe Cara can bring Mojo and Checkers, and it will be a party!
18. Speaking of parties...Cindy's first birthday is in the first week of July. I am SO throwing her a birthday party. Charissa already said she'd come. I'm sure Rex and Jake can bring Houdini and Patch, and Cara can bring Mojo and Checkers. It will be so fun.
19. Weddings - my cousin Julie is getting married August 1, so I have to be invited to that wedding because I'm her cousin. Kelsey's getting married August 14, and she already told me I'm invited to that. I love weddings. I can't wait!
20. Cheddar - the poor girl must feel so neglected when I'm away at school and can't play with her. Just because I'm a rat lover doesn't mean I forget about my little mouse.
21. Walking to Meijer - this was super cool until we all turned sixteen and got our licenses. Then we just drove everywhere. I want to go back to walking.
22. KAMSC!!!! How has it taken me this long to put this on the list?? I love KAMSC!! As a second year teacher (fourth year working at KAMSC!), I'm not as nervous as I was last year. Plus, Beth is teaching this year too, which is sweet. Getting paid $17.67 an hour to do something I would volunteer for (don't tell Ms. Fisher that...lol) is seriously a good thing.
23. Dorothy, Clare, and Carly - On the subject of kids, these are my cousins-who-aren't-really-my-cousins-because-they're-Rex's (but I secretly think they like me better). Last summer we had tea parties and dress up days, and it was so fun. Also, last summer they took one of my KAMSC classes. Rex's Aunt Beth says that Dorothy's bugging her about going again this year, so hopefully I have them as students again! I will TOTALLY play favorites. lol.
24. Double dates - Rex and I double with lots of fun people. Josh and Charissa, Dan and Jula, Beth and Chris, Lynn and Larson, Rex's grandparents (ha ha...this is surprisingly really fun), and others. We will NOT double with my parents again. That was a DISASTER! Funny, but not funny enough to do it again. Ever. lol.
25. No homework when I don't want to do homework - As I said before, I'm excited about summer classes. I'm especially excited that they're self-paced, which I've done before so I'm used to it. It's great - I just do homework when I have time to, and there are really no deadlines. Plus, I only have to get a 2.0 in the classes because as long as I pass they transfer to MSU with no grade reported. Hooray!
26. A car - after not having a car for the past nine months, it will be great to have a set of wheels again.
27. Going back to school. I will continue my countdown from now until then, but I can't wait until fall - SENIOR YEAR!! HOORAY!!!
So yeah, this year was great, hopefully the summer will be better, and hopefully next fall will be even better than that. Life's going well.
Motto for the summer: Beautiful day, great to be alive!
Monday, May 4, 2009
Why Edward Cullen Cannot Exist
***WARNING: DO NOT READ THIS POST IF YOU HAVE NOT READ ALL OF THE TWILIGHT BOOKS AND PLAN ON EVER READING THEM IN THE FUTURE. THERE ARE SPOILERS***
I feel as though vampire mania is sweeping the nation. The Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer has been called "the new Harry Potter" by many, and the books have sold millions of copies. There were midnight parties last fall celebrating the release of the movie Twilight, and there promises to be even more hysteria this fall with the release of the movie New Moon.
So I ask myself: why all of this hype?
I first wondered about the movie's male lead: Robert Pattinson. Girls everywhere are going nuts over him. A girl in my Bible study has a life-sized cardboard cutout of him in her apartment. I've noticed girls surfing fansites of him on their laptops during my math classes. There have been books written about him, and he's on the cover of multiple celebrity magazines every month. Why? Honestly, he's not that incredibly attractive. That's what started my quest to solve this Twilight hysteria mystery. He's not ugly, but based on looks alone I see no reason why he would cause this much of an uproar. I first thought perhaps this was a situation like the one I had in high school, where all of the girls in my class thought Eric was soooo sexy but I just wasn't seeing it. Upon further investigation, though, I realized that this is not the case. As a general trend from those I asked, those who had read the Twilight books found Robert Pattinson attractive, and those who had not read the books wondered, like me, what all of the fuss is about.
From this I came to the conclusion that girls are not in love with Robert Pattinson the actor, but rather are in love with Edward Cullen the character. I read the books myself to further investigate this theory, and it is one that I now believe is completely true. Edward Cullen is pretty irresistable. I've had girls from Jr. High obsessing over him and divorced single mothers telling me how they secretly pine for Edward Cullen as well. He appeals to all ages - why? I have come to the conclusion that it is because Edward Cullen is an ideal character and makes a great boyfriend/husband in the stories, but he is an unrealistic character due to circumstances in society today.
For girls to wish they could find their own version of Edward is kind of silly. While he is a work of literary genius, his character could not realistically exist in our world today. The first reason is because Edward is constantly doing heroic things to save Bella's life. In the books this is seen as great and Bella is seen as a practically helpless girl relying on Edward every step of the way. Even with overlooking the fact that real guys can't run at the speed of light and pick up vans, guys who are constantly rescuing girls are seen as white knights. The existence of a white knight is still longed for, but the existence of damsels in distress is becoming more and more frowned upon. If a girl is constantly needing rescuing and is fully dependent on a man, she is seen as forsaking her independence and as a "sellout" to her feminist peers. Girls are supposed to be strong and self-sustaining, and for a guy to constantly be saving them would be looked on with disdain rather than with admiration as they are in these books.
Another reason Edward cannot exist is because of his constant pressure on Bella to marry him. He convinces her to marry him at age eighteen and gets her pregnant on their honeymoon. In the books this is seen as soooo romantic and great that they're young and in love. In reality, if someone gets married and has a baby at age eighteen, this is seen as incredibly weird. Parents would not be as supportive as Edward and Bella's parents are. Society would put such a social stigma on them that it would undoubtably have an effect on their relationships with their families and friends and, in turn, on their relationship with each other. Also, raising a baby and keeping up a house at age eighteen would be financially pretty difficult if not impossible. Luckily, Edward has an unlimited supply of money at age seventeen. No seventeen year old in the world has an unlimited supply of money. Real people have to have jobs and have to struggle for a while before they can stand on their own feet. This is less romantic, though, so it's not in the story.
Edward can also not exist because his ending cannot exist. At the end of the Twilight books, Edward, Bella, and Renesme live happily ever after in their perpetually young and beautiful states with unlimited money, fancy cars, and beautiful house. Eternity is not seen as a progression of time that all of the characters will live through but rather a frozen state in which the moment of their extreme happiness will never end. This cannot happen. No one can be happy all the time. People are all going to have struggles in life, and the ups and downs of life are all part of reality. Edward never has to lose - he always wins and lives happily ever after in the end of any situation.
So, while many girls are looking for their "Edwards," they're going to be looking for a long time. He is a great ideal and makes a fantastic addition to the stories, but I fear that girls who constantly find themselves measuring the guys they meet against Mr. Cullen will find themselved perpetually disappointed. He's a fictional character, and no one quite like him will ever be able to exist. The fact of the matter is that reality keeps this from happening.
I feel as though vampire mania is sweeping the nation. The Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer has been called "the new Harry Potter" by many, and the books have sold millions of copies. There were midnight parties last fall celebrating the release of the movie Twilight, and there promises to be even more hysteria this fall with the release of the movie New Moon.
So I ask myself: why all of this hype?
I first wondered about the movie's male lead: Robert Pattinson. Girls everywhere are going nuts over him. A girl in my Bible study has a life-sized cardboard cutout of him in her apartment. I've noticed girls surfing fansites of him on their laptops during my math classes. There have been books written about him, and he's on the cover of multiple celebrity magazines every month. Why? Honestly, he's not that incredibly attractive. That's what started my quest to solve this Twilight hysteria mystery. He's not ugly, but based on looks alone I see no reason why he would cause this much of an uproar. I first thought perhaps this was a situation like the one I had in high school, where all of the girls in my class thought Eric was soooo sexy but I just wasn't seeing it. Upon further investigation, though, I realized that this is not the case. As a general trend from those I asked, those who had read the Twilight books found Robert Pattinson attractive, and those who had not read the books wondered, like me, what all of the fuss is about.
From this I came to the conclusion that girls are not in love with Robert Pattinson the actor, but rather are in love with Edward Cullen the character. I read the books myself to further investigate this theory, and it is one that I now believe is completely true. Edward Cullen is pretty irresistable. I've had girls from Jr. High obsessing over him and divorced single mothers telling me how they secretly pine for Edward Cullen as well. He appeals to all ages - why? I have come to the conclusion that it is because Edward Cullen is an ideal character and makes a great boyfriend/husband in the stories, but he is an unrealistic character due to circumstances in society today.
For girls to wish they could find their own version of Edward is kind of silly. While he is a work of literary genius, his character could not realistically exist in our world today. The first reason is because Edward is constantly doing heroic things to save Bella's life. In the books this is seen as great and Bella is seen as a practically helpless girl relying on Edward every step of the way. Even with overlooking the fact that real guys can't run at the speed of light and pick up vans, guys who are constantly rescuing girls are seen as white knights. The existence of a white knight is still longed for, but the existence of damsels in distress is becoming more and more frowned upon. If a girl is constantly needing rescuing and is fully dependent on a man, she is seen as forsaking her independence and as a "sellout" to her feminist peers. Girls are supposed to be strong and self-sustaining, and for a guy to constantly be saving them would be looked on with disdain rather than with admiration as they are in these books.
Another reason Edward cannot exist is because of his constant pressure on Bella to marry him. He convinces her to marry him at age eighteen and gets her pregnant on their honeymoon. In the books this is seen as soooo romantic and great that they're young and in love. In reality, if someone gets married and has a baby at age eighteen, this is seen as incredibly weird. Parents would not be as supportive as Edward and Bella's parents are. Society would put such a social stigma on them that it would undoubtably have an effect on their relationships with their families and friends and, in turn, on their relationship with each other. Also, raising a baby and keeping up a house at age eighteen would be financially pretty difficult if not impossible. Luckily, Edward has an unlimited supply of money at age seventeen. No seventeen year old in the world has an unlimited supply of money. Real people have to have jobs and have to struggle for a while before they can stand on their own feet. This is less romantic, though, so it's not in the story.
Edward can also not exist because his ending cannot exist. At the end of the Twilight books, Edward, Bella, and Renesme live happily ever after in their perpetually young and beautiful states with unlimited money, fancy cars, and beautiful house. Eternity is not seen as a progression of time that all of the characters will live through but rather a frozen state in which the moment of their extreme happiness will never end. This cannot happen. No one can be happy all the time. People are all going to have struggles in life, and the ups and downs of life are all part of reality. Edward never has to lose - he always wins and lives happily ever after in the end of any situation.
So, while many girls are looking for their "Edwards," they're going to be looking for a long time. He is a great ideal and makes a fantastic addition to the stories, but I fear that girls who constantly find themselves measuring the guys they meet against Mr. Cullen will find themselved perpetually disappointed. He's a fictional character, and no one quite like him will ever be able to exist. The fact of the matter is that reality keeps this from happening.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Letter to myself at 15
Hi fifteen-year-old me,
Don't kill me. Seriously, okay? Just read this and then give me a chance to explain. Since I know this is the number one question mark in your head at this point, I'm going to answer the question for you but then tell you how you got there: You go to Michigan State. Okay? Breathe. It's okay. It's not because MSU was your only option. You got into plenty of great schools. MSU just turned out to be the best, and you LOVE it here. Seriously. God knew what He was doing when He sent you to MSU. You're an education major. Funny, huh? You're so set on journalism right now...silly Christine. You don't like pressure and crazy spontaneous deadlines. You don't like writing what other people tell you to. You LOVE kids. Shouldn't the choice be obvious? Anyway, the College of Education at MSU is the #1 College of Education in the country (for the fourteenth year in a row this year!), so you're at the best school you can be at for your major. PLUS, in-state tution is definitely an advantage when you have to pay tuition. Yeah, you get a few scholarships and such, but it is surprisingly difficult to come up with thousands of dollars. You manage, though. Don't worry. Right now I'm a year away from graduating, and the financial horizon is pretty bright. Don't stress.
Speaking of "don't stress," Christine you have to CALM DOWN. You freak out too much. Yeah, KAMSC is hard, but let me let you in on a little secret: you do, in fact, graduate. Your final GPA comes out to a...3.86, I think? Yeah, that's right, I don't even remember it right now. I know that your GPA is practically engraved into your brain, but it doesn't actually matter that much. Seriously. There's going to be this one night where you go out for pizza with Laura and Emily (you meet them at the Civic) and spend the whole night laughing your head off and then don't get your Chemistry extra credit done on time, and you get a B+. Let me just tell you right now: WORTH IT. So worth it. The fun that you have in high school far outweighs the importance of your GPA. Once you start college, no one cares about it anyway. Plus, you get a 32 on the ACT, which is sweet. That opens a lot of doors.
KAMSC's killer, yeah, but you need to not stress out too much. Seriously. You spend way to many hours freaking out. Your study group is the BOMB, though. I'm 20 and still friends with all of them. It's way more fun when we get together now and don't have to study. :-)
Other than school...I guess the second most important thing you care about would be boys? Hmm...advice for you... OH! Since I know you're wondering about this, yes Nick does actually like you back. Don't date him for so long, though. As it stands right now, you guys make it through 10 months (oh, and contrary to what you believe, you don't get dumped). Don't let yourself get that attached, though. I mean, seriously Christine - you know that relationship is going nowhere. Why waste so much time on it? PLUS, there's this amazing guy waiting for you...and when you're hanging out with Nick you don't get together with the other guy until much later. Do you want to know who it is, or do you want to be surprised? Hmmm...knowing you, you want to know who it is. Okay, ready for this *drumroll*.....Rex Webb. Okay, once again, don't freak. He's not bald like in middle school when you date him. lol. He gets really attractive junior/senior year, you guys have Spanish 4 together (oh yeah, you skip Spanish 3) , and you become best friends. When you go to the hospital for five days junior year, Nick visits you once and Rex is either there and/or calls every single day. He's a really, really good guy. He doesn't tell you that he likes you because you have a boyfriend (once again, drop Nick sooner), but you guys stay close until a few months after you and Nick break up, at which point your friendship with Rex starts to become something more. He's amazing, Christine. The best guy in the world, I swear. You guys have been dating for two and a half years now, and he LOVES you. You love him, too. Oh, and I know you said that you never wanted to date anyone for more than two years before you married them, but you fell in love when you were seventeen. Getting married fresh out of high school wasn't very practical - you just weren't planning on falling in love quite so soon. You guys haven't been waiting because you're not sure about each other, though. I know that's what you were worried about. Mom and Dad dated for five years because they couldn't decide whether or not they wanted to commit...you and Rex decided to get married after you'd dated for two months. Yes, you were totally freaked out. But hey, as of now you guys are still together and just waiting it out until you're "old enough" to tie the knot. You graduate next year - who knows what will happen? But yeah, just know it's not one of those "Eh...do I actually like him?" type of things. You do like him. A lot.
Speaking of Mom and Dad...give them a break. They're not so bad. Especially Mom. You give her so much crap - I think you don't really know how much you hurt their feelings. Be nice. In three years you leave for college. Oh, and help Cara find new friends. Her Heritage friends turn super weird when they get to Jr. High. Renee threatened to kill her last week, and Amanda (yeah, she's thirteen) is dating a 21 year old. So find her some cool friends, ok? You're her sister - it's your job. As of now, though, Cara's still cool.
Anyway, that's about it for now. Keep your chin up and don't worry so much. Follow Christ in everything you do, because whenever you try to follow your own plans it turns out badly. He knows what He's doing with your life, so relax and enjoy it! :-)
Love,
Twenty-year-old me
Don't kill me. Seriously, okay? Just read this and then give me a chance to explain. Since I know this is the number one question mark in your head at this point, I'm going to answer the question for you but then tell you how you got there: You go to Michigan State. Okay? Breathe. It's okay. It's not because MSU was your only option. You got into plenty of great schools. MSU just turned out to be the best, and you LOVE it here. Seriously. God knew what He was doing when He sent you to MSU. You're an education major. Funny, huh? You're so set on journalism right now...silly Christine. You don't like pressure and crazy spontaneous deadlines. You don't like writing what other people tell you to. You LOVE kids. Shouldn't the choice be obvious? Anyway, the College of Education at MSU is the #1 College of Education in the country (for the fourteenth year in a row this year!), so you're at the best school you can be at for your major. PLUS, in-state tution is definitely an advantage when you have to pay tuition. Yeah, you get a few scholarships and such, but it is surprisingly difficult to come up with thousands of dollars. You manage, though. Don't worry. Right now I'm a year away from graduating, and the financial horizon is pretty bright. Don't stress.
Speaking of "don't stress," Christine you have to CALM DOWN. You freak out too much. Yeah, KAMSC is hard, but let me let you in on a little secret: you do, in fact, graduate. Your final GPA comes out to a...3.86, I think? Yeah, that's right, I don't even remember it right now. I know that your GPA is practically engraved into your brain, but it doesn't actually matter that much. Seriously. There's going to be this one night where you go out for pizza with Laura and Emily (you meet them at the Civic) and spend the whole night laughing your head off and then don't get your Chemistry extra credit done on time, and you get a B+. Let me just tell you right now: WORTH IT. So worth it. The fun that you have in high school far outweighs the importance of your GPA. Once you start college, no one cares about it anyway. Plus, you get a 32 on the ACT, which is sweet. That opens a lot of doors.
KAMSC's killer, yeah, but you need to not stress out too much. Seriously. You spend way to many hours freaking out. Your study group is the BOMB, though. I'm 20 and still friends with all of them. It's way more fun when we get together now and don't have to study. :-)
Other than school...I guess the second most important thing you care about would be boys? Hmm...advice for you... OH! Since I know you're wondering about this, yes Nick does actually like you back. Don't date him for so long, though. As it stands right now, you guys make it through 10 months (oh, and contrary to what you believe, you don't get dumped). Don't let yourself get that attached, though. I mean, seriously Christine - you know that relationship is going nowhere. Why waste so much time on it? PLUS, there's this amazing guy waiting for you...and when you're hanging out with Nick you don't get together with the other guy until much later. Do you want to know who it is, or do you want to be surprised? Hmmm...knowing you, you want to know who it is. Okay, ready for this *drumroll*.....Rex Webb. Okay, once again, don't freak. He's not bald like in middle school when you date him. lol. He gets really attractive junior/senior year, you guys have Spanish 4 together (oh yeah, you skip Spanish 3) , and you become best friends. When you go to the hospital for five days junior year, Nick visits you once and Rex is either there and/or calls every single day. He's a really, really good guy. He doesn't tell you that he likes you because you have a boyfriend (once again, drop Nick sooner), but you guys stay close until a few months after you and Nick break up, at which point your friendship with Rex starts to become something more. He's amazing, Christine. The best guy in the world, I swear. You guys have been dating for two and a half years now, and he LOVES you. You love him, too. Oh, and I know you said that you never wanted to date anyone for more than two years before you married them, but you fell in love when you were seventeen. Getting married fresh out of high school wasn't very practical - you just weren't planning on falling in love quite so soon. You guys haven't been waiting because you're not sure about each other, though. I know that's what you were worried about. Mom and Dad dated for five years because they couldn't decide whether or not they wanted to commit...you and Rex decided to get married after you'd dated for two months. Yes, you were totally freaked out. But hey, as of now you guys are still together and just waiting it out until you're "old enough" to tie the knot. You graduate next year - who knows what will happen? But yeah, just know it's not one of those "Eh...do I actually like him?" type of things. You do like him. A lot.
Speaking of Mom and Dad...give them a break. They're not so bad. Especially Mom. You give her so much crap - I think you don't really know how much you hurt their feelings. Be nice. In three years you leave for college. Oh, and help Cara find new friends. Her Heritage friends turn super weird when they get to Jr. High. Renee threatened to kill her last week, and Amanda (yeah, she's thirteen) is dating a 21 year old. So find her some cool friends, ok? You're her sister - it's your job. As of now, though, Cara's still cool.
Anyway, that's about it for now. Keep your chin up and don't worry so much. Follow Christ in everything you do, because whenever you try to follow your own plans it turns out badly. He knows what He's doing with your life, so relax and enjoy it! :-)
Love,
Twenty-year-old me
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