My Math History

So I have this class, and I had to write my "math history" for it. I had to give a high point, a low point, a turning point, two "math scenes," my single greatest challenge, and two possible futures (one positive, one negative). This assignment is WEIRD. I kind of had fun writing my responses, though, so I'm posting them here. Hopefully my professor isn't too incredibly serious...


My Math History

The high point in my mathematical history was in fifth grade (is it bad that I piqued in fifth grade?). Anyway, my school participated in "Math Olympics." I won the Math Olympics competition in my class, so then I got to go compete against other mathematically advanced students in Michigan. At that competition, I won first place! HOORAY! I was incredibly proud of myself and how I represented my school, and I felt very intelligent. I still have my trophy...don't judge.

My math low was in high school. I attended KAMSC (Kalamazoo Area Math and Science Center), a magnet school for students gifted in math and science. My senior year, I was in a Calculus class and - for the first time in my life - was entirely confused by the mathematical concepts. I could go ahead and blame the teacher, but I feel that it would be more realistic to blame my infatuation and constant flirtation with the guy who sat next to me. Whatever the reason, I did not understand the concepts. My friend Sara helped me in Calculus whenever I needed it, and I could usually scrape together enough comprehension to do decently well on the tests. My grade wasn't awful, but I did not feel that I grasped the material. I hated the feeling of inadequacy and stupidity, so this was my math low.

I would say that my math turning point would be in college when I decided to begin a math minor. After my twelfth grade Calculus shenanigans, I had decided that I wasn't good at math. After scoring very well on the math placement entrance exam at MSU, I had the opportunity to never take a math class again. I was very excited about this. After a while, though, I really started to miss math. I liked the challenge of the problems and the logic of how everything works together so neatly. Before, elementary/middle school math had been something that I was good at, in high school math was something I had to get through, but in college I saw math as something I actually enjoyed. This was a weird revelation for me. Given the choice to never take math again, I didn't take it! That still boggles my mind sometimes, but in general I am very glad that I decided to do a math minor.

Math scene #1: When I was five, my dad tried to teach me multiplication with Hershey's kisses on my great-grandmother's coffee table. It was largely unsuccessful. I mean, I was FIVE! When that failed, he tried to teach me percentages which was, again, unsuccessful. If I didn't understand multiplication, I'm not sure how he expected me to understand percentages. Anyway, I was frustrated by this exchange, but I was more intrigued because this opened my eyes to exactly how much I didn't understand about the world. I decided that I wanted to learn all of these crazy mathematical conepts, and that when I was older I would understand EVERYTHING.

Math Scene #2: It was kind of cool to come full circle and teach a class that I once took. I teach math and science camps for children in the summer, and I attended those camps as a young student (um, can we say "NERD"??). Anyway, my first year as a teacher there was four years ago, and I taught the class "Teddy Bear Math," which I attended as a kindergartener. It was a cool feeling.

Single Greatest Challenge: In a word, CALCULUS. I have already explained about my Caluculus problems in twelfth grade. I took Calculus I again in college, and I worked my butt off. I practically moved in to the MLC and to the professor's office hours, and I came out with a 4.0. YAY! I tried to take Calc II online, though, and that epically failed. I mean, math online? This is just a bad choice. I should have seen that coming. Therefore I still need to take Calc II, and I'm very nervous about it.

Positive Math Future: Assuming I finish my math minor, a positive math future would be one in which I can teach students math concepts and get excited about the logic and preciseness of the subject. I did not find a love of math until college, and I believe that it would have been very useful to achieve that mindset earlier in life. In a positive math future, I would be able to do this.

Possible extension of this future: Maybe I will be able to inspire one of my students to love math, and they will become very skilled in it. They will work outside of school to persue math concepts beyond what we are learning in class. Because they are so good at math, they will excell in Physics in high school. Because they are good at Physics, they will major it in college. Then, because they are so good, they will get lots of grant money for research, and they will make some huge breakthrough. They will win a Nobel Prize and start their acceptance speech with, "Well, I owe it all to this one teacher..."

Negative Math Future: I am one class away from finishing my math minor (that pesky Calc II), and in a negative math future I would not finish that minor. I would go on to never use the math minor that I worked my butt off to achieve, and I would feel a large sense of regret over the loss of tuition money and effort put into it.

Possible Extension of this future: Perhaps, because I feel such a sense of guilt and inadequacy, I will quit the field of Education altogether. Because the economy right now is just booming...yeah, right...I won't find another job. Because I have no job, I will lose my house and become a hobo living on the streets of Chicago (why Chicago? Not sure. Sounds like a good place for hobos). I won't be a very experienced hobo, though, so food will be scarce and the other hobos will almost certainly pick on me. I'll probably die in some sewer and be left to be eaten by rats, but my last words will be, "If only I had finished that math minor..."

What I really hate, is improper comma usage

Ew. That title literally hurts my eyes.

I have found a new respect for my friend Carly. She works in the writing center at GVSU. I absolutely cannot stand proofreading people's papers when there are grammar errors in them (as there inevitably are), and I had to do that yesterday. Now I am blogging about it because I need a place to vent.

If a friend asks me to proofread a paper or essay for them, I don't mind at all. As a Language Arts major, I have the skills to help them out. I will NOT proofread it in front of them, though, because I get too worked up. Sometimes in class we have to do peer review in class, and that's tough. I have to contain myself when I get all frustrated.

Why do I get so frustrated by grammar and punctuation errors? I don't know. I just really, really do. For some reason I feel that all college students should know how to use basic grammar and punctuation. These are not strong points for my mom, so sometimes she will have me grade her students' papers for her. Well, she used to anyway. I don't do it anymore because it makes me too angry. I will literally sit and write all over the paper, sighing angrily and saying things out loud such as, "Oh my gosh WHY would you think a comma goes there?!?" or "YOU'VE MADE THAT MISTAKE FOUR TIMES!! CUT IT OUT!" or "I am going to call your old English teachers and tell them that they FAILED with you!" Yeah, it's pretty bleak.

Last night one of Rex's friends asked me to proofread a paper for him, and I just about lost it while I was proofreading. First of all, he asked me to proofread it and then handed me the computer. I gulped and said, "You want me to proofread it here? Right now?" I glanced nervously at Rex, and he just smiled. He knows how much I hate that. The friend said that yes, I did have to proofread it right then because the paper was due in a few hours. Blast. I steeled myself and decided that I would not freak out if there were grammar and punctuation errors. Besides, this guy is pretty smart. There probably wouldn't be any anyway.

Let me just give you a few snippets of the ensuing conversation I had:

Me: "Um, if i see something small that needs to be fixed, do you want me to fix it?"

Him: "Like what?"

Me: "Like indenting the first line of the paper..."

Him: "Okay, sure."

*gripping my leg to keep from freaking out...this is going to be a long paper*

Me: "I'm going to go ahead and capitalize this word because it's at the beginning of a sentence. Is that okay?"

Him: "I guess, if you're sure it's supposed to be capitalized."

Me: "Yes. I'm quite sure."

*digging my nails into the palm of my hand so hard it leaves marks*

Me: "I think a colon would work better in this sentence."

Him: "What's a colon?"

Me: "Uh...the thing with the two dots..."

Him: "Okay, whatever."

*biting my tongue to keep from saying something like, "Who let you pass elementary school English??"*

The good news is that I made it through, and I was able to keep my composure. I must say, though, it was HARD. I can't believe that Carly does this everyday to help people with their papers. I find it too emotionally taxing. I left in an absolutely horrible mood, upset with an education system that never taught him things such as colons and capitalizing the first letter of sentences. Rex found it humorous how much this angered me, but it really did. HOW is it okay that he didn't know those things?! He's not dumb! He definitely could have known them if someone would have TAUGHT him correctly!!!

If my future students don't use punctuation correctly, especially commas, I will just kill them. Then they won't grow up and make people proofread their horrible papers.

Perhaps that is a bit extreme; I must rethink that position.

Now I have vented, and I feel better. Thanks for reading. Want me to proofread any of your papers? Ha ha...

Weddings are not a big deal

It jars my brain a little bit to even see this title actually typed out in print on my screen. But it's true. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage. The wedding doesn't matter - I'm preparing for a marriage.

Desking

I am incredibly bored working behind the Mayo front desk, and I don't want to pull out my homework. It's Friday night, for goodness sake! So instead, I am going to write a haiku. Today my friend Melanie came to visit me with her four year old son Travis. He's...well...here's the haiku:

Running, jumping, CRASH
Guard all of your valuables
Human tornado

The kid is CRAZY! He's pretty funny, though. He was running down my hall causing all sorts of a hullabaloo, and people were poking their heads out of their doors to see what was going on. Rex held him over his head like a "jet" so that Travis could fly down the hall at warp speed. I can't decide if Travis makes me want to have kids or to never have children ever, but what I do know is that it's fun when he visits and he does all sorts of cute things. It was really good to see Melanie too. I was in her wedding...oh goodness...nine years ago? (I am OLD!), and now we're talking about mine. Weird how life comes full circle like that, you know? I mean, when you think about all of the intricacies of life, it makes homework seem completely irrelevant! Therefore wasting time behind the desk is totally justified. :-)

Happiness

I think that a lot of times people like to vent about things that are going wrong in their lives or how their problems are just making things really difficult.  I have times when I need to do this too.  Lately, though, I've been venting about something else: I. AM. SO. HAPPY!!!

Seriously, I have never had a more "happy" period in my life than what I am experiencing right now.  Sometimes I feel guilty because I know people are struggling all around me, yet I am so blessed!  So, so blessed.  Like, all-my-dreams-came-true-and-I-can't-imagine-life-any-better-than-this blessed.  Therefore, because I know there will come a time when I am not so belligerently happy, I am going to write about my joy right now so that maybe I can bottle up a bit of it to drink of later when life gets harder.

Let's take a look at my life right now.  I am getting married to my best friend in less than eight months.  I loved him like crazy before we got engaged, but being engaged has brought us even closer (which I didn't realize was possible).  I bet that when we get married we'll get even closer still, and that is mind-boggling.  I just love him so much!  I am so thankful that God brought us together. 

Okay, so I'm deeply in love.  That's enough to make anyone's life happy.  Let's move on.  Not only am I in love, but last month I got back from a trip to Australia that I won in a random sweepstakes.  I have been so lucky in drawings lately - I've won a trip to Australia and New Zealand (which was AWESOME), an ipod, $200 cash, and a $40 Macy's Gift card.  Ummm...cool!  So I keep entering sweepstakes waiting to see what I will win next.

So I'm in love and I'm lucky.  Pretty good life, right?  It doesn't stop there!  Lately my family has been getting along SO MUCH better than in the past.  My parents aren't fighting as much.  Last weekend I even saw them HOLD HANDS (*gasp!*).  He bought her a kayak, and then she let him borrow it without even getting mad.  You don't realize how huge this is.  They seem to - dare I say it? - LOVE each other!  This makes me want to frolic through campus and just do some ridiculously giddy dance because my family is going to stay together, and they're going to be happy about it!  Hooray!!!  Also, my little sister Cara and I went SHOPPING together last weekend.  The sister who I had to pay $1 to let me curl her hair and then she cried because of the awful "girliness" of it all voluntarily went shopping with me.  She actually suggested it!  She's turning into a little woman, and she actually wants me to be a part of it.  She's one of my best friends, and I love how often I get to talk to her.  My family is getting tight - like, boy scout knots tight - and I am so thankful for that.  I couldn't ask for anything more.

I'm in love, I'm lucky, my family is getting really close...could life get better?  Surely not!  Oh but wait - it does!  I took a job as an RA at MSU this year, and because of this job my amount of friends at school has at least doubled.  I have all of these really close friends now that a year ago I would not have even been able to identify.  Going through crazy RA training does something to people, though, and in a KAMSC-esque fashion we all just became super close super quickly.  Not only do I love my new friends, but I love having such a good excuse (wedding) to stay in touch with my old friends too.  It's easy to call them about wedding plans (I have eight bridesmaids.  Don't judge.  I couldn't narrow it down), and then actually just end up talking about life.  Between my new friends and my old friends, I always have people to talk to.  I genuinely care about them, and I feel like they care about me too!

Love. Luck. Family. Friends.  Let's see...other areas of my life?  Oh, school.  School is great.  None of my classes are horrible, and some of them are GREAT.  I'm taking YOGA, for goodness sake!  I love Yoga, and I look forward to it every day.  All of my classes this semester are actually applicable to real life in obvious ways, and that is awesome!  Perfect set-up for a senior year.

Lastly (but most importantly), God has been teaching me so much lately.  I feel as though in the past I've grown most during times of suffering, but now I'm learning that I can grow in times of prosperity as well!  I feel like God is really showing me a lot about myself and His plan for my life, and that is awesome!  To wake up in prayer has never really happened to me before, but I'm starting to learn what He meant when He said "pray continually."  To be so close to Him is amazing.

My whole life I have wished I was someone else.  When I was really little I wanted to be my mom because I thought that all adults were perfect.  When I was in seventh grade I wanted to be Kaleigh becuase Marcus liked her, and clearly that was the most that any girl could ever ask for.  In high school I wanted to be Leah because she could run so fast, or possibly Carrie because she was the homecoming queen.  I also wanted to be a celebrity because they were so universally loved.  Being Beyonce would have been awesome - she was the ideal picture of beauty and talent.  Now, though, I honest to goodness would not trade places with anyone - celebrity or otherwise.  Not for a million dollars.  I am happy with my life just the way it is, and no one has a life I would desire more.  God loves me the way I am, Rex loves me the way I am, so I do too.   You know what?  I honestly believe that if Rex had a choice between Beyonce and I, he would choose my ski-jump nose and huge feet over her sparking smile and dazzling curves.  Call me naiive, but I know that it's true.  There's some amazing security in that.  What a weird guy, but I love it.  He thinks he's the luckiest person in the world, but I know the truth.  I am.

When walking down the street, I'll sometimes (an embarrassingly high number of times) randomly break into a goofy grin or just start laughing because I can't contain all of this joy.  People think I'm really weird, but whatever.  I can't keep it inside.

MY LIFE IS AMAZING

Cheeky Little Boy

I've never had a brother, but I always wanted one.  I have one sister and I love her TO DEATH, but I always wondered what it would be like to have a brother.  Would he be nice?  Would he be obnoxious?  Would we be friends?  Would I like his friends?  Would we ever hang out?  Would I have to do the dishes less times per week?  What does it actually mean to love someone "like a little brother?" I feared that I may never have these questions answered.  This summer, I ended up living with my best friend Carly and her family.

And I found my little brother.

Taylor Crookston is pretty much the bomb.  If you have ever read my "Inside These Crookston Walls" blog, I'm sure you read plenty about him and his hilarious antics.  Living with the Crookstons was a BLAST, and it 100% would not have been the same without Taylor.  He gave me the first glimpse of what it would be like to have a little brother, and I LOVED it and I love him (as a little brother, of course - hence the whole point of this blog post).

Taylor is pretty much the teenage boy version of Carly (which, until this summer, I did not realize was possible).  I mean, if you take Carly and subtract boobs, mascara, lots of boy drama, and add some manly stuff, you've got Taylor.  This might explain why we became so tight so quickly.  I love Carly, so what's not to love about Taylor?  The more I got to know him, though, the more I got to know his individual characteristics and what makes him unique.  He's really, really awesome.  If you don't know Taylor, you should.  According to Carly, maybe I like him too much: "Christine, you like Taylor better than me!!!" was heard a few times. Anyway, we got pretty tight and blahdy blahdy blah.  End of summer.

Okay.

So THEN...I got engaged. (YAY)  And THEN...I realized another fundamental difference between Taylor and Carly.  Carly would never be cheeky enough to post a blog entry like this:

The Official Plea

Who (at the Crookston household) was the first to accept your pet/best friend? Me. Who do you have a rat"like" secret handshake with? Me. Who do you bond with about naming Beyonce's baby, Sasha? Me. Who has taken you on a date in the last three months (that was not your fiance)? Me. Who tricks you into watching "not-so-sad" movies like Steel Magnolias? Me... that one still might be tender :) Who came to Cindy's birthday party... happily? Me. Who has won "Crookston Moment of the Day" countless times? Me. Who is going to cry at your wedding and already knows it? Me. Who is the best "little brother" in the world? Obviously me. Who is tacky enough to ask to be apart of your wedding party via a blog? Me... Does this qualify me to be an usher in your wedding? Why, yes, I would love to think so, but it is up to you. It would be a great honor to be a very small part of one of the happiest days of your life.
Love, Love, Love
Taylor

I mean, what do I do with this?  I guess my choices are to awkwardly turn him down, ignore it altogether, reluctantly agree, or just tell him that he had it in the bag from the moment I got my ring.

Taylor, if you're "tacky" enough to ask via blog, then I'll return the favor.  Will you please, please be an usher in my wedding?  Rex and I would be incredibly lucky to have you as a part of our special day.

Love love love,

Christine

Letter to Myself at 25

Dear 25-year-old me,

First of all, congratulations on being alive. There were definitely a few tumor-y years there where I thought you would never exist. So, if you really are 25-year-old me and reading this, SWEET. You made it to a quarter of a century. You can no longer use a 24 pack of candles on your birthday cake. Good for you.

I have a million questions, but I suppose they are pointless because by the time you read this they will already be answered. Oh, well. From that point of view this whole letter would be pointless, so here we go. You did marry Rex, right? Please say yes? Because if you are still with him, 25-years-old and not married, I am seriously mad at you. You have been together for what, eight years? If you're not married by then, that's ridiculous. If you broke up with him, you're an idiot. You and I are officially in a fight (can you fight a different aged version of yourself? I will look into this). If he broke up with you...well, that's just silly. He wouldn't do that. I mean, you wouldn't break up with him either... Whatever. I just hope you guys are married, and I hope he asked you before you were practically old, like, 23 or something. He he he... ;-)

On the note of marriage, do you have any kids? I hope not. Why on Earth would you want to have a kid, especially at the age of 25? I'm sure if you do have one then he/she is all cute and blahdy blahdy blah, but your twenty-year-old self can't really comprehend that kind of responsibility at this point. Kids are scary! You mess them up enough by teaching them - don't try bringing one of your own into the world yet. You throw birthday parties for your rat; I think you have some issues to work through. lol.

You did graduate from MSU in 2010, right? Because that's definitely the plan. Let's not deviate from that, okay? And you got the math minor? Have you used it yet? I really hope you use it in life. What are you doing for a job, anyway? Do you like it? If you don't like it, why don't you quit? Do something you love. I realize you need money and all that, but teaching is your passion. Please do that? Unless you're a stay at home mom or something (back to "please don't have kids yet!"). Please don't call me immature and naiive for telling you to do something you love. See it is "pure of heart." I know people who have ruined their lives by working a job they hate. Don't do that, okay? Promise?

How's your relationship with God going? Is it better than when you were 20? I hope so. It should get better every day. PLEASE tell me you've read through the entire Bible at least once. Don't get stuck in Ezikiel like I keep doing. Make it through! He loves you so much - are you being a living sacrifice for Him? Do people see Him in you? Are you giving all you have for His glory? That's all that really matters in life, you know.

Is the family doing okay? Please tell me they're all still around. Nana would be what, 77? That's not that old. Please don't tell me the cancer came back. How's Cara? She's graduating this year, isn't she? Where's she going to college? Did she go crazy in high school? (PS - your 20-year-old self calls it that she does). Are Mom and Dad more in love than they were when you were 20? Send them a note or something. They've gone through a lot to hold the family together. Is Dad more mature than when you were 20? (The 20-year-old self calls it that he's not). Also, did he ever sell that house? Did Cara get her dog?

Let's see...advice for me at 25...don't lose sight of the fact that you can't take life too seriously. The things I'm freaking out about right now: getting my passport in time for Australia, graduating on time, whether or not I'll be a good RA...how many of those matter to you at 25? Probably not many. How many of your problems will matter when you're 30? Just keep things in perspective, okay? God's got it all under control. He knows right where you will be when you read this, just like He knows right where I am in life right now as I write this. Pretty cool, huh? He can see both of us at the same time. HI, YOU! (I'm waving at you as you read this). Anyway, follow His plans, because your plans, when not in line with His, inevitably fail every time. If you've learned nothing else in twenty years of living, that's it. I'm sure you'll have to learn it again and again by the time you're twenty-five.

Do cars run on water yet?

Here's to your next five years,
20-year-old you