Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Happiness

I think that a lot of times people like to vent about things that are going wrong in their lives or how their problems are just making things really difficult.  I have times when I need to do this too.  Lately, though, I've been venting about something else: I. AM. SO. HAPPY!!!

Seriously, I have never had a more "happy" period in my life than what I am experiencing right now.  Sometimes I feel guilty because I know people are struggling all around me, yet I am so blessed!  So, so blessed.  Like, all-my-dreams-came-true-and-I-can't-imagine-life-any-better-than-this blessed.  Therefore, because I know there will come a time when I am not so belligerently happy, I am going to write about my joy right now so that maybe I can bottle up a bit of it to drink of later when life gets harder.

Let's take a look at my life right now.  I am getting married to my best friend in less than eight months.  I loved him like crazy before we got engaged, but being engaged has brought us even closer (which I didn't realize was possible).  I bet that when we get married we'll get even closer still, and that is mind-boggling.  I just love him so much!  I am so thankful that God brought us together. 

Okay, so I'm deeply in love.  That's enough to make anyone's life happy.  Let's move on.  Not only am I in love, but last month I got back from a trip to Australia that I won in a random sweepstakes.  I have been so lucky in drawings lately - I've won a trip to Australia and New Zealand (which was AWESOME), an ipod, $200 cash, and a $40 Macy's Gift card.  Ummm...cool!  So I keep entering sweepstakes waiting to see what I will win next.

So I'm in love and I'm lucky.  Pretty good life, right?  It doesn't stop there!  Lately my family has been getting along SO MUCH better than in the past.  My parents aren't fighting as much.  Last weekend I even saw them HOLD HANDS (*gasp!*).  He bought her a kayak, and then she let him borrow it without even getting mad.  You don't realize how huge this is.  They seem to - dare I say it? - LOVE each other!  This makes me want to frolic through campus and just do some ridiculously giddy dance because my family is going to stay together, and they're going to be happy about it!  Hooray!!!  Also, my little sister Cara and I went SHOPPING together last weekend.  The sister who I had to pay $1 to let me curl her hair and then she cried because of the awful "girliness" of it all voluntarily went shopping with me.  She actually suggested it!  She's turning into a little woman, and she actually wants me to be a part of it.  She's one of my best friends, and I love how often I get to talk to her.  My family is getting tight - like, boy scout knots tight - and I am so thankful for that.  I couldn't ask for anything more.

I'm in love, I'm lucky, my family is getting really close...could life get better?  Surely not!  Oh but wait - it does!  I took a job as an RA at MSU this year, and because of this job my amount of friends at school has at least doubled.  I have all of these really close friends now that a year ago I would not have even been able to identify.  Going through crazy RA training does something to people, though, and in a KAMSC-esque fashion we all just became super close super quickly.  Not only do I love my new friends, but I love having such a good excuse (wedding) to stay in touch with my old friends too.  It's easy to call them about wedding plans (I have eight bridesmaids.  Don't judge.  I couldn't narrow it down), and then actually just end up talking about life.  Between my new friends and my old friends, I always have people to talk to.  I genuinely care about them, and I feel like they care about me too!

Love. Luck. Family. Friends.  Let's see...other areas of my life?  Oh, school.  School is great.  None of my classes are horrible, and some of them are GREAT.  I'm taking YOGA, for goodness sake!  I love Yoga, and I look forward to it every day.  All of my classes this semester are actually applicable to real life in obvious ways, and that is awesome!  Perfect set-up for a senior year.

Lastly (but most importantly), God has been teaching me so much lately.  I feel as though in the past I've grown most during times of suffering, but now I'm learning that I can grow in times of prosperity as well!  I feel like God is really showing me a lot about myself and His plan for my life, and that is awesome!  To wake up in prayer has never really happened to me before, but I'm starting to learn what He meant when He said "pray continually."  To be so close to Him is amazing.

My whole life I have wished I was someone else.  When I was really little I wanted to be my mom because I thought that all adults were perfect.  When I was in seventh grade I wanted to be Kaleigh becuase Marcus liked her, and clearly that was the most that any girl could ever ask for.  In high school I wanted to be Leah because she could run so fast, or possibly Carrie because she was the homecoming queen.  I also wanted to be a celebrity because they were so universally loved.  Being Beyonce would have been awesome - she was the ideal picture of beauty and talent.  Now, though, I honest to goodness would not trade places with anyone - celebrity or otherwise.  Not for a million dollars.  I am happy with my life just the way it is, and no one has a life I would desire more.  God loves me the way I am, Rex loves me the way I am, so I do too.   You know what?  I honestly believe that if Rex had a choice between Beyonce and I, he would choose my ski-jump nose and huge feet over her sparking smile and dazzling curves.  Call me naiive, but I know that it's true.  There's some amazing security in that.  What a weird guy, but I love it.  He thinks he's the luckiest person in the world, but I know the truth.  I am.

When walking down the street, I'll sometimes (an embarrassingly high number of times) randomly break into a goofy grin or just start laughing because I can't contain all of this joy.  People think I'm really weird, but whatever.  I can't keep it inside.

MY LIFE IS AMAZING

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